Tuesday, February 24

It is like eating Cupid's heart

(The lighting on the photo is bad.  It is actually sort of pretty.)
Here it is.  My modified Bacon Explosion (still needs a new name).  Bacon weave, bbq rub, Italian sausage, crispy bacon, bbq sauce, roasted garlic mashed potatoes (made with a bit of cream cheese), spinach, a bit more bbq sauce.  Cooked in a oven at 275° for approx 2 and a half hours plus another 20 minutes at 375° (in an attempt to crispt up the outer shell).

Yes.  It is magnificent.  It looks more burned than it is and all of that is just the bbq sauce.

There are some things I'd change.  Thinner layers but more spinach.  And fresh spinach.  And less sweet bbq sauce.  And spicier bbq rub. I should have made the sausage, potato, crisp bacon and spinach layer on a piece of plastic wrap to get a tighter roll.   And it definitely would benefit from being grill over hickory.  

I fear however that the bliss that would be created by making it better might break my mind.

Have you ever woken up in the middle of the night to discover that your lover, finding you aroused in your sleep, has taken you between their legs and begun to make love to you?  Not in a creepy way.  But you wake up to find yourself already close to climax.  And then you realize that your lover is actual the goddess Venus?  And The Pogues are playing live in your bedroom, but it isn't your bedroom? It's actually a tropical beach and a crystal clear night, temperature just cool enough to cool the sweat on your skin? And off in the distance, a lighting storm lights up winged unicorns that do battle in the sky for your enjoyment?  And then Venus begins to feed you bacon?

It's like that but in loaf form.


One slice was enough.  Now the rest of it sits downstairs, mocking me for not being enough of a man to appreciate its glory.