Quick! Where do I find books and a cat?!

Map of Known Library Cats

(via Neatorama)

Pride and Prejudice and Zombies

"Pride and Prejudice and Zombies" features the original text of Jane Austen's beloved novel with all-new scenes of bone crunching zombie action.

Temptation of Neil/Neal

I went to the bookstore yesterday. Neil Gaiman and Neal Stephenson both have new books out. Two of my favorite authors. Joy of joys. (I really wanted to call this post "The Two Neals" or "The Two Neils." I tried a version of "The Two Neials" but it really didn't make any sense.)

Gaiman has finally published The Graveyard Book which has yet another story that I wish I had thought of first – Boy raised by ghosts in a graveyard. It's like The Jungle Book of the Dead. But I have long come to terms that any clever idea I have will have been thought up by Gaiman first.

Compared to Gaiman's standard sized book (320 pages), Stephenson's Anathem is a beast (960 pages). It also defies easy description. Something about the far future, math monks, immortality, god I don't know what else. I have long come to terms that I could never come up with Stephenson's ideas.

I bought neither. I am still reading Infinite Jest. I am loving it but it is a work out. It is hard to read Jest "casually." I am trying to really pay attention this time and not skim over the more difficult sections (like, say, 10 pages with only half a dozen punctuation marks). It would be very easy to "take a break" and read something else... but then I'd never get back to it.

Sigh. Well, at least I have books to look forward to in 2009.

What I've Been Thinking About Lately

After it kept coming up in conversations, I decided to re-read Infinite Jest. It's been about ten years. After just three chapters it's back at the top of my favorite books. I can't quite put my finger on it. The characters – Hal's in the opening scene...his disconnect to what is going on around him and even what is going out of his mouth... "We witnessed something only marginally mammalian in there, sir"... heartbreaking and hilarious. The themes – addiction, family, consumerism, entertainment. The straight up love of words. And it is dense and unforgiving to the reader but in such a way that is so rewarding in the end. It's not a book I am going to devour this time. I plan on savoring it this go around.

•••

My back started to peal on Thursday and hasn't stopped. Yes, it is disgusting. And it itches like hell. The sslowly flaking front line has finally reached the small of my back to the small injury I received during my 201 Musical Improv show. I have no idea why that tiny injury refused to heal right. Yet another silly minor scar with a silly story. (To go with (1) "That was from a vacuum cleaner while playing Ed Norton in a separatist-feminist version of Alcestis," (2) "That was from making clockwork awning for a theater," and (3) "That was when I cut myself with a bagel... no, not while cutting a bagel... I cut myself WITH a bagel.")

•••

Related confession: I really enjoy and am fascinated by the process of pealing long sheets of skin off my arms and legs.

•••

The complexity of age has crossed my mind lately. It's a hard thing to talk about. Age is relative but there are aspects of it that do affect you. You go through stages. They aren't clear cut but they are there. It's not about maturity. It's just about "stuff that happens." For example, before you turn thirty you might scoff at the idea of crossing that artificial mile marker. (I know I did.) "It means nothing. There is no greater difference between 29 and 30 than there is between 28 and 29 or 30 and 31." But when you are in it, late at night, reflecting back at life's pile of failure and regrets and looking forward at the diminishing amount of future available to you... it affects you. That is just one example. Explaining to someone what having a seven year relationship end in failure (even if you know that the relationship made you into the you you are now and you like that you and are glad you are that you and not another different you) will never quite be understood if they haven't experienced something similar. Empathy only goes so far. But it is hard to explain to people why age makes a difference without coming across as condescending.

•••

When asked my favorite part of the U.S. Constitution, I usually go with good ol' Amendment numero uno. I think there is a reason it was first. I don't hate the media and the press. Sure, they make me angry at times but I firmly believe that they are MASSIVELY important in this day and age. So my hackles were certainly raised by charges that the "left-wing biased media" were asking "unfair and mean" questions and Gov. Palin's past and record. You know what? You pick a basically unknown to be your candidate for Vice President a few scant days before your national convention (which, lets be fair, is just a four day commercial), it is the media's job to ask fucking questions. You didn't give them a whole lot of time to figure out what questions to start asking so they had to ask any ones that came up. Half the questions they asked were "So, how do Republicans at the convention feel about this thing?" And the answer they got was "We love it!" So, hey, Republicans? You got some mighty fine coverage last week. Enjoy it. You came out looking good... except when you were whining like little bitches that the media was attacking you. You make an off-the-wall "maverick" choice, well, guess the fuck what? People are going to try to figure out the whys, whats and whos. (I normally refrain from swearing here but sometimes it's called for.)

Also go listen to On The Media this week. I heart Brooke Gladstone and Bob Garfield so much.

•••

I do love good dramatic exit lines. I really appreciate people who want to make their lives like a movie, especially a smart movie. I do it all the time. I once gave the greatest speech of my life as an exit line. After she told me that we couldn't continue (or even get past the opening moments of) our starting relationship because in the past she always hurt people she loved and she could tell she was falling for me hard and she didn't want to hurt me, I just stood up, put on my shows and walk to the door... not saying a word. My had rested on the doorknob for three long breaths. I turned back to her. She was sitting on her couch, clutching a throw pillow to her chest. And I began to laugh slightly.

"You," I began, "are stupid. Not a stupid person because you are one of the smartest people I know. You are smart, funny, kind, entertaining, talented almost beyond measure... and, well, extremely sexy and beautiful. But, right now, at this moment, you are stupid. I couldn't care less about what you did in the past. I don't want to be with who you were in the past. I want to date the you right here in this room. And I'm not any of the men you have dated in the past. I am me. And we have something. You just said so. There is something between us that could be something incredibly special. But you want to run and hide behind your pillow because you are scared of the past and the future. Yes, you might hurt me. I might hurt you because god knows I've done that too. Yes, it may all end badly. Let's be fair. Most relationships do. But to not even try because you like me too much? That, [her name], is just plane stupid."*

And I smiled, opened the door, and walked out.

Great moment. But of course life isn't a movie. She didn't throw open her window and yell at me to come back. That's the problem with most well-crafted exit lines in the real world: the other person hasn't learned their part.

*As true as this event is, I am sure time and my ability to romanticize just about anything has tweaked some of the details in my memories.

•••

I made a milkshake today that was so super-delicious that I am filled with bliss.

•••

It is possible to be super jealous of someone and super happy for them at the same time. These are the times I think to myself, "Why am I giving them advice on this? Why don't I take my own advice sometimes and place myself in that position?"

•••

There is an up coming class that I really hope I get into. It's with a teacher I really want to continue with, working on a form I think I'd be really good at and that I'd learn tons from. I also have this issue/anxiety about advanced classes since I keep not getting to them. I don't seek out praise or confirmation but I'd like a shot at least. Again, if I don't get in, I will be super-jealous and super-happy for those that do.

Books

For some reason, books in a lot of conversations in the last week. Perhaps my friends are all trying to better themselves. Maybe we are all just sick and tired of talking about improv. Who knows?

Here's my recommendations off the top of my head.

Man in the High Castle by Philip K. Dick
This is PDK's masterpiece. Some of his other books are more daring (A Scanner Darkly, VALIS) and some will mess with your head more (Ublik), but High Castle is wonderfully crafted and not as self-indulgent as a lot of his stories. (Side note: PDK not only used the I Ching as a major plot device, but used it as he was writing to make choices about where the story would go.

Geek Love by Katherine Dunn
Love, romance, and a messed up family of circus freaks. What's not to love?

Infinite Jest by David Foster Wallace
It's a dense book but very rewarding. Don't try to think too hard about it while reading or you'll just get confused. It all adds up (except where is it doesn't). Another messed up family, addiction and consumer culture in the near future. I once lived in a house and we hung a sign with "Te Occidere Possunt Sed Te Edere Non Possunt Nefas Est" on the wall.

Bone by Jeff Smith
Yeah. This is a comic book but a masterful one that is often skipped by comic nerd because the art looks all Disney-ish. A great epic tale.

Good Omens by Neil Gaiman and Terry Pratchett
For my money one of the funniest books ever written. But then again, I have always found the Apocalypse funny.

Bunny Modern by David Bowman
I actually like his first book Let The Dog Drive better, but that is in part because I read it when I was young and confused and it struck a cord. Bunny Modern is a slim book with weird ass ideas. Maybe it is not a great book but it is wholly original. Make sure you read the About the Font in the back.

Babbitt by Sinclair Lewis
Hilarious, cutting and still current. The suburban Great Gatsby. Proto-Simpsons.

Devil In The White City by Erik Larson
Fantastic tale of the 1893 Chicago World's Fair and a serial killer. Non-fiction. This is my favorite time period. The clash of the industrial age, with all of its wonderful inventions and ambition, leaving a dark smear of soot and darkness. Also read Larson's Thunderstruck about the development of the wireless telegraph and also murder.

A favorite passage

I'm re-reading Neal Stephenson's Cryptonomicon (for probably the forth or fifth time). It's not that it is a particularly deep book. I just find its style appeals to me on a level few books do. There is an early sentence that I have always adored. It is early on, when Lawrence Waterhouse starts to spent time with Alan Turing.

One day a couple of weeks later, as the two of them sat by a running stream in the woods above the Delaware Water Gap, Alan made some kind of outlandish proposal to Lawrence involving penises. It require a great deal of methodical explanation, which Alan delivered with lots of blushing and stuttering. He was ever so polite, and several times emphasized the he was acutely aware that not everyone in the world was interested in this sort of thing.

Lawrence decided that he was probably on of those people.

And later...

Alan and Rudy's relationship seemed closer, or at least more multilayered, than Alan and Lawrence's. Lawrence concluded that Alan's penis scheme must have finally found a taker.

The Book As Art

We went to the National Museum of Women in the Arts today. The they have an exhibition called The Book As Art: Twenty Years of Artists' Books. Very very cool. It was inspiring to see all of the ways books, storytelling and the written word can be expressed. It did leave me with a sense of wanting, as book exhibits usually miss out on one important factor: the sense of touch. Books are meant to be felt. Pages are meant to be turned. And in many of the art pieces, it is how the artist played with (or against) that very aspect of books. Ah, well. Not much to be done about that.

Anywhozits, if you are in Washington D.C. anytime before February 4th, check it out.